Unfortunately it's that time of year again that all males dread. A time for our girlfriends to make irrational demands and expectations well exceeding their poor boyfriends bank balance, of course I am talking about Valentines day. The thing that people might find annoying is that the day was originally to commemorate the lives of a trio of Christian matyrs who were all named Valentine and none of these were connected to romance in the slightest. The person we have to blame for this is Geoffrey Chaucer, I for one was already not a big Chaucer fan for what he put most of us through in secondary school English, but when I saw that it was him we have to blame for this joke of a day i wondered if his plan all along was to leave a legacy of annoying poems and the most pointless day in the calendar for years to come. And I'm adament that Chaucer will be chuckling away in heaven or hell knowing the pain and anguish he is causing to us all.
This Valentines day will be the fifth that i've spent with my girlfriend and like any other girlfriend she always ends up disappointed on the 14th of February. It's not that i don't try and make an effort but its just the recurring problem that is becoming too regular in my life that i am hopeless. For example i wasn't aware that tables needed to be booked in advance so one year we spent an hour in the cold outside eagerly waiting for our buzzer to go off so we could tuck into their delightful Italian Cuisine. Another time I totally forgot, it's not exactly as well publicised as christmas is it? You don't hear Band Aid for months before as a warning, its an honest mistake. My girlfriend however was not very sympathetic infact i was shunned for several days after.
My main grumbles with Valentines day are firstly, that it has been built up too much by cheesy Hollywood films, girls need to realise that the majority of them will not be cruising through Venice on a gondola or eating garlic bread beneath the eiffel tower. It's not that i wouldn't like to do that sort of thing for my lady friend it's just not feasible on a student loan. Secondly I'm going to complain about the showoffs who do do this type of thing on Valentines. In the words of the Kaiser Chiefs 'Loves not a competition but I'm winning' its this mentality I disagree with it's not a competiton. Whoopty doo you took your girlfriend for a hot air balloon ride over to Spain where you ate Tapa's and proposed on a beach overlooking the sunset, me and my girlfriend had a takeaway and watched Geordie Shore, we still had a great evening regardless I just refuse to be drawn into this competition.
I know this seems like an incredibly long winded way to justify to my girlfriend why she'll only be getting chocolates and a hand made card but if it works it'll be totally worth it.
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